What the Warcraft?
by SkullFox
Summary: This was just another Idea to cure my writer's block since I was unable to find anything to write, and my roommates and guildmembers all suggested that I post it so...in advance I am very sorry if this offends any WOW players out there...
1. Episode 1: Books & Boneheads

**Episode #1: Books & Boneheads……**

**~Cast~**

**Randy – Randyhealon (Aggramar lvl 70 Night elf Warrior)**

**Jeff – Jeffdraco (Aggramar lvl 76 Human Warlock)**

**Alex – Ravenusrogue (Aggramar lvl 57 Night elf Rogue)**

**Nick – Vyserage (Aggramar lvl 80 Human Paladin…he bots)**

It was a hot, mid-summer's day when a small group of friends were traveling through Trisfal Glade, their adventures had lead them to believe that a lost artifact was located within the seemingly undead land that was once a lush forested area, that many Azarothians admired for it's beauty. The artifact in question was no more than a simple book but nonetheless it was worth a man's weight in gold. Their group was small indeed, two night elves, and two humans. There was Jeff...who had studied magic most of his life, and though he claimed to be adept, his spells, thought powerful in their own right...never quite seemed to work out. The other human of the group, Nick, was simple, and calm...he often found himself at a stand point for dangerous situations...but, unlike most paladins, his skills were somewhat....lax. Randy the shorter of the two Elves, had trained in the sword since he was still very young, unfortunately unlike most of his ilk, his mind was...somewhat absent...and finally there was Alex, what most in Azeroth considered the most unskilled rogue and thief every...the night elf did however have an unnatural streak of luck, which at most times seemed to even out nicely...

Jeff stopped the group's travel for a moment as he dusted off hid blood red robes, "You know...we need to get a few girls to travel with us...or maybe even a squirrel, anyone smart enough not to step in a pit fall trap." He half shouted looking to the tall, heavily armored elf to his left.

Randy was never very good when it came to watching his step, "Sorry Jeff." He said in the tone of a scolded child.

Jeff rolled his eyes, "I wasn't talking about you...moron. I was referring to the other idiot."

Alex who had attempted to blend into the shadows, was a bit taller than Randy, though his hair was a bit shorter and of a darker shade, "We can still see you, idiot. That only works when you're standing still...and your party can still see you."

"Oh...right." Alex said catching up to the other three, "Well in my defense, Randy did trip me."

Jeff sighed with frustration, "Hole in the ground or no. You should know that Randy's a warrior...i.e...not smart." This got the human a harsh glare from the barbaric elf, "Stronger than hell." He added in defense, "Just as dumb as a %#$'n brick."

"What the %#$ was that? gasp there it is again." Nick shouted. The paladin had recently taken a substantial blow to the back of the head, which resulted in the loss of his memory, "Seriously why the %#$ can't I say %#$?"

"Nick...calm down." Alex said, "That's just the ratings. Thanks to this dumb $$ writer, we're not allowed to say %#$ in this story. You know these teen ratings." At that moment he realized something, "Wait a second does that mean none of us are gonna get lucky in this story?"

Jeff turned to the elf, "That is a distinct possibility. Then again, 'Mr. Holier than thou' over there ain't gotta worry about that anyway. Paladins aren't allowed to do that."

Nick thought for a moment, "Wait! I remembered something...I finally remembered something!" The paladin shouted excitedly.

"What?" Jeff shouted, "Is it where you left my Fel-iron enchanting rod? I could really use that back right about now."

For a moment Nick went silent, before finally he spoke...

"CHEESE IS %#$ING DELICIOUS!!!" He suddenly jumped looking around, "Holy *^&% there's that %#$'n beep again!"

Alex walked by slapping the paladin in the back of his head, "We already know that...."

Randy paused for a moment in mid step, "Wait. Where were we going again?"

"See now you went and confused the warrior again." Jeff shouted, "We are going to the Scarlet, that means red......Mo-na-sta-ry, to find....a book. Small square thing with words inside." He explained slowly.

Randy simple stared at Jeff for a moment before flipping him off...

He replied, "Anyhow, how will we know when we get there?"

As they walked along their current path Jeff pointed with his thumb off to a sign on the side of the road, with a severed hand pointing down the road...

_-Scarlet Monastery this way......5 man raid- =_

"Well..." Randy said after reading the sign, "That's convenient." He said happily.

It took little time before the four young adventurers were standing in front of the large, castle-like monastery, where Alex was busy wiping blood from his face. He seemed a bit frightened at the least. When Randy had rushed in to attack he'd neglected to notice the theif behind the monk who's unfortunate fate was that of any person standing in the master swordsman's path once his mind was made up. Unfortunately for Alex it was a rather short mind to begin with...which nearly lead to the rogue's decapitation...

"Alex...we've told you a million time." Jeff yelled, "Don't get in the way when he starts swinging those things around."

"Sorry about that Alex..." Randy said putting away the second of his two massive swords, "I didn't mean to...you know...almost kill you."

Nick was a bit lost in the whole thing, "Do you think these guys have any cheese? I don't know why but, I want cheese."

Jeff shook his head as he headed into the Monestary, "They're all zombie chow...well, maybe not Randy...he tends to attack just about anything that doesn't look friendly enough." He sighed, "What are the odds of finding a mentally handicapped swordsman?"

_**2 hours later……**_

Randy found himself in a lone, dark scary hall, barely lit by anything. His clambering footsteps echoed through the halls, but unfortunately that was all he could hear...

"Guys..." He called, "Guys...this isn't funny. It's dark. I'm afraid of the dark......" He paused for a moment lowering his head, "So very lonely."

_**Elsewhere in the Monastery……**_

As Jeff, Alex, and Nick rounded a corner down a hollowed corridor, Jeff stopped the group before looking out at several men dressed like the unlucky fellow that was slaughtered at the front gates...

"Okay..." He whispered, "There's only 13 or 'em. Randy you could...." The robe wearing leader turned to the group, "Randy? HOLY HELL OUR MEATSHIELD---" He half shouted before stopping himself, "Umm---I mean, Oh no, we seem to have misplaced Randy."

_**Some dark place……**_

It was as the lonely night elf made his way through the halls that he could hear something carrying through the darkness, it was odd sounding something like a small tune, and as he made his way through the darkness he could make out words to a small song...

_-Total...Slaughter...-_

_-Total...Slaughter...-_

"Hello?" Randy called, "Is someone there. Unless you're a ghost or something then you can please stay where you are...I don't like ghosts."

_-I won't leave a single man alive...-_ The voice continued.

"You know...that song is slightly disturbing...." Randy added, "Not to knock at your choice in music but, maybe something a little happier?"

_-La Dee Da Dee Die...Gen-o-cide...-_

"I really don't like this song..." The now frightened night elf shouted.

_-La Dee Da Dee Dud...an ocean of blood...-_

Randy stopped for a moment, "You know they have pills for those kind of thoughts. I take a pretty purple one."

_-Lets begin...the killing time...-_

"Sir...or ma'am. If you would I'd like to get out of this dark place. I have friends that may need me..."

_**Back with Jeff and the others……**_

Jeff sighed as he dangled with his hands and feet bound to a pole suspended by two other poles several feet off of the ground...

"I miss Randy." He sighed again looking to Alex the rogue and Nick, who mindlessly swung his body back and forth like some sort of swing.

"Hey guys..." He said in the midst of his incessant rocking, "I'm my own hammock."

Alex had enough, "Oh for the love of god. Would someone please just kill him...or kill me first so I don't have to listen anymore."

As Nick rocked back and forth humming some kind of happy tune, Jeff could hear the sound of the pole supporting the idiot beginning to give way to the constantly shifting weight. Suddenly he got an idea...

"Hey Nick. Bet I can swing higher than you."

Nick gasped with an absent minded smile, "You're on!"

_**Back to the dark place……**_

Randy found himself near what appeared to be some sort of alter. It was composed of several different layers of steps that led up to a strange looking dais where there was the handle of a lovely looking blade protruding from the stone. It was a rather large weapon, with golden fittings. It's hilt was designed very strangely as it was covered in what appeared to be some kind of soft white fur that blew from a seemingly unexistent wind over what looked like an eye at it's center, a long scarf of cloth hung from the pummel of the weapon, and two slightly curved black, horn-like designs arched over it's handle...

"Wow...pretty sword." Randy said as he approached the altar.

_-Oh wow I got a winner this time...-_ The same voice from earlier huffed.

Randy's rather absent look vanished instantly replaced with the resolve of a honed swordsman, as his weapons seemed to be drawn in what seemed like less than a heartbeat...

"Who's there?!"

_-Nice reflexes...-_ The voice came from behind him this time causing the elf to turn around.

_-That's right...right here in front of you-_

Randy stopped for a moment, "Holy %#$ a talking alter!"

_-No genius...the sword...talking sword- _The voice corrected him in an annoyed tone.

The warrior paused and looked about for a moment, "Holy %#$ a talking sword!"

_-Bravo...I'd clap for you but I don't have any hands-_

Randy cocked his head as he put his weapons away, "Why is there a talking sword down here?"

_-These $$holes locked me down here...-_

Randy frowned, "Well that's not very nice at all."

_-Ye...no, no it wasn't. Say could you pull me out of this altar?-_

"Probably...I am pretty strong." Randy replied standing there.

_-Well?-_

"Well...you didn't say please." Randy replied sheepishly.

_-Ooookay. Would you PLEASE pull me out of this altar?-_

_**Back with Jeff's group……**_

-Snap- -Thud-

"Ow!" Nick shouted, "My face hurts." He said from his face down position on the stone floor.

"Congratulations, your head actually has feeling in it." Alex replied.

Jeff noticed the sound of footsteps in the hall outside the room, "Look Nick. I don't know what they have in mind for us...but, you need to get me and Nick down before they come back. Or they might kill us."

Nick slowly made his way over to Jeff and began to pull at the knots holding his hands and feet in place, "What about me?" Alex asked.

Nick turned to Alex, "You're a #*$%..." He said, "there's that %#$'n beep again."

Luckily the rest of their trip spared no sort of problems, that was until they reached the a rather large, open room where a man stood trying to read through the pages of an odd book. It was as they stood there that the man's head jolted toward the group. He thrust his palm toward them and a massive bolt of fire burst against the wall behind them. As they stood there being bombarded by fireballs, Jeff looked to Nick...

"You're a paladin get your $$ in there." He said pushing him toward the room.

Nick kept resisting, "But why do I have to go? He's scary."

"Cuz someone has to be the %#$'n meatshield."

"I MISS RANDY!!!" The poor moron shouted as Jeff finally shoved him into the room.

As Nick rose his shield and walked inside, Jeff turned to Alex, "Okay and now while he distracts the fire. You sneak up on him and kill him."

"And what the hell are you gonna do?" Alex replied defensively.

"I'm the supervisor."

After a short while, Alex finally seemed to vanish as he disappeared into the room. Jeff couldn't help himself but to watch and see what was going to happen. As he suspected Nick simply stood there like a moron, holding his shield in front of his face, trying to protect himself from the strange mage's fiery onslaught, while Alex, who was hard enough to see in his current state, made his way around behind the man. Unfortunately, as the rogue made his way around to the man's back his foot caught on an fold in the rug beneath his feet causing him to fall to the ground with a thud. The mage's attention instantly turned from the 'moronic meatsheild' to the would be assassin. Who froze in fear as the man's hand began to charge another bolt of fire...

"I MISS RANDY!!!" The assassin yelled as the fireball impacted the ground beside him sending his body flying against a nearby book shelf which collapsed on top of the mage.

Jeff stood there stunned as the magic user crawled from under the pile of books, "How the %#$ did you miss?! He was 2 feet in front of you!" He thought for a moment, "I mean....yay. Alex isn't dead."

The man stood up with a look of rage in his eyes as his palm began to glow red with charging magic causing Alex to cower in fear of being burned to a crisp. Fortunately the pain never came, Alex opened his eyes instead to find the point of a large sword protruding from the man's chest. As the mage fell to the ground in a lake of his own blood a familiar night elf ran down the hall toward them...

"See..." He said to the sword in his left hand, "Told you I could hit him from the other hall."

Jeff paused while lifting an eyebrow, "Is he talking to that sword?"

Randy finally made it to the room, "Hey guys look what I found." He said holding up a rather well decorated claymore.

"WHERE THE %#$ WERE YOU!?!" Jeff shouted.

Randy looked at the ground, "I was in a dark place. It was lonely. Then I found Bob here..." He said lifting the sword, "He showed me the way out."

_-My name is not Bob!!!-_

Alex looked confusedly at the night elf manchild, "He named his new sword Bob?"

_-You insufferable %#$piles! I am not Bob!!!-_

Randy looked to the weapon, "Bob. That was not nice." He seemed to scold the sword before sliding it into his beltline.

Jeff rolled his eyes as he walked into the room to retrieve the strange book the mage was carrying. He found that it's leatherbound cover was designed in the figure of a grimacing face, it's eyes and mouth risen off of the face of the book, strange runes decorated the outside boarder of the book, and it was strapped shut across two points over the front of the small object, "Here Randy. I feel safer with you hanging onto this." He said tossing it to the warrior, only to have the book halt just inches from his hand and glide back to Jeff's, "Or I'll hang onto it. That's good too."

"That was cool Jeff." Randy shouted in amazement, "Do it again."

As they left the building Jeff held up the book, "Either way Maniacal Laughter Inc. Recovery Service gets paid today."

"Yes. Paid..." Nick shouted, "Then we can all have cheese."

Alex aptly slapped the paladin in the back of the head, "Ow...Jeff, Alex hit me."

"Well hit him back..." Jeff replied, "Don't make me send Randy back there."

_**To be continued......

* * *

AN:**_ I found a few discrepancies on the original chapter 1 as I was going over things. Also decided that all characters that make an appearance will be shown ahead of time...thanks all...


	2. Episode 2: The Redundancy Continues

**AN:** Once again I'd like to apologize to anyone out there that actually plays WoW. Sorry. This is what happens when you mix me, with writer's block and boredom, and one too many log on hours to WoW. Anyhow hope some of you at least get a giggle or two out of this ... R&R and thanks for reading...

* * *

**Episode #2: The Redundancy continues.…..**

A hearthstone's throw away, the band of misfit adventurers found themselves at their guild hall. The old, run down village of Moonbrook. An old abandoned church was their headquarters, and even thought the defias had run rampant through the town, they were much too smart to actually try anything against the pack of adventurers, as they found that the warrior could be used as some sort of armored attack dog. Not to mention the fact that the guild hall was home to several other characters as well, each of whom was out on other missions for Maniacal Laughter Inc. Unfortunately as they arrived the group found a small flaming paper bag on the guild hall doorstep...

"AHH!!!" Nick screamed, "FIRE!!!"

The human rushed over stomping out the fire, not even bothering to notice the coyote droppings in the bag...

"I don't know what's funnier..." Jeff pointed out walking toward the church, "The fact that these bandits keep doing that...." He said allowing the others to walk in.

Alex slapped Nick in the back of the head, "Or the fact that this Donkey Punch keeps falling for it." He finished, "And wipe your boots off before you come inside this time."

Randy stood there for a moment, "I---don't get it..." He said cocking his head to one side, "Bob, could you explain this I'm confused?"

_-For the love of everything HOLY!!! I AM NOT BOB...-_

"Wow...someone's a little grouchy. You need a nap." He said sliding the sword back into it's sheath.

As they all entered the large structure, Alex lay in one of the bunks they'd moved into the building...he, like everyone else there, was exhausted...then again, he was nearly killed twice today. It was as the Assassin lay in his bed that he produced a Kriss from his belt carving a notch in the wall. The entire space was nothing but small notches tally marks...

"So, Alex..." Jeff called headed for a small room off to the side of the building, "What's the tally at?"

Alex took a brief look at the wall, "487...and that's if you don't count that incident with the Gnolls last month. Still I wish this was the tally for the number of jobs we've had and not how many times Randy's damn near killed me."

Soon the entire gang was sitting in the center of the church, talking quietly as they enjoyed a small tapped keg generously supplied from their dwarven friend in the hills Grimbooze Thunderbrew, it wasn't the greatest drink in Azeroth but, it did the trick after a dangerous mission. While Jeff sat in the back room, a kitchen they'd set up, getting ready to make something to eat. When they heard the sound of a small explosion outside the guild hall...

"Visitor..." Alex called.

As they sat there waiting for the visitor to make his, or her way inside Randy sat by scribbling some sort of dribble into a small journal he kept. Nobody dared read it yet, as they all feared that nothing within it's confines would make any sense at all. As they waited a very large, blue skinned fellow walked into the room completely out of breath...

"WHAT THE $#% IS THAT!?!" Nick screamed in shock dropping his mug of the thick lager, "Son of a #$%^* there's that beep again."

Alex looked a bit worriedly at the paladin, "It's just a Draenei, Nick, geeze."

Nick pointed to the large fellow, "No THAT!"

Alex looked to the Draenei's shoulder to see a severed hand, "Um...buddy...you got a little someth'n on yer shoulder."

The blue one looked to his shoulder. His eyes widened as he slapped it away, "AHHHH!! Get it off!"

Unfortunately the hand landed on Randy's journal, which he was still writing in...and if you mix a man child with alcohol you get problems...

"HOLY #&$% A SPIDER!!!" He screamed knocking the thing away quickly jumping up and stomping on it several time with he plate mail covered foot, "BIG #*$'N SPIDER! KILL IT, KILL IT, KILL IT!!!!" He continued dropping to his hands and knees pounding it into the floor with his fist, causing blood to fly up into his eyes, "OH GAWD!!! POISON!!! MY EYES!!! I'M BLIND!!! WHY!?! WHY!?! FOR THE LOVE OF---"

"RANDY!!!" Alex shouted getting the panicking warrior's attention, "It's a $&%#ing bandit's hand. That's just blood..."

Randy stopped for a moment to catch his breath, and wiped some of the stuff from his eyes, "Oh...sorry. I don't like spiders." He explained going back to his writing.

Suddenly Nick jumped from his seat, "THAT'S IT!" He shouted, "I REMEMBER...I MUST BE A BANDIT!!!"

The blue skinned fellow was having serious second thoughts about this at the moment...

"Nick..." Alex said, "Sit down before you hurt yourself...for the last time you...are..a...#&%$ing…Paladin."

Nick looked to his armored body, "Is that why I've got all this on?" He asked pulling a kite shield from his back, "And what the #&$% is this? A dinner plate? There's that #&%$'n beep again."

"Nick that's your sheild." Alex corrected the moron.

"Oh...then do I have to stop eating off it?" He asked pulling his weapon, "And does that mean that this isn't a kitchen knife?"

Alex looked a bit confused, "NO...actually that is a kitchen knife."

Randy looked up for a moment, "Um...Nick. Where's your sword."

_**In the kitchen.…..**_

Jeff stood by a pot of boiling stew, being a rather accomplished cook he laid out some carrots and reached for a kitchen knife from a knife block and brought it down with a heavy thud, the blade of a long sword nearly removing several of his fingers. His eyes widened as he lifted the blade up to eye level...

"HOW THE FU----"

_**Back to the Others.…..**_

Alex and the others sat by listening to the large Draenei fellow's problems. It seemed that when his people's ship...The Exodar...crash landed on the Azuremyst isles, he lost a small pouch of rare gemstones that had been passed down along the lines of his family for several generations...they sounded rather important to him. Luckily the stranger was willing to pay a handsome price to have them returned to him. After a short while they party had their fills of the soup that Jeff had prepared for everyone, when Alex began to fill Jeff in on what he'd missed, but, for some reason the story made Jeff choke back a fit of laughter until he finally couldn't take it anymore...

"Wait,wait,wait,wait,wait...." He said holding his sides, "He...lost his family jewels? That poor bastard."

This time Alex burst into laughter, "I never really noticed that he was asking us to find his family jewels."

Randy soon joined the two laughing as well, Nick of course did not understand, "Why is everyone laughing?" He asked.

Randy stopped to catch his breath, "I don't know…I just didn't want to feel left out."

As the hours passed by, they all began to ponder where they would begin such a search. Jeff was certain that if they had been lost around the island where the Exodar had crashed that would be the most likely place to find them. It was a bit of a ridiculous mission for them but, for the most part it was work…and work meant getting paid…returning the book they'd retrieved could wait until later , as for right now however, another job simply meant bigger pay when they finally finished with them both.

"So where do we start?" Alex asked.

Jeff stopped for a moment, "The same place we always start…THE GOLDSHIRE PUB!!!"

_**Several hours later in Goldshire……**_

The small town was always bustling, thought it consisted of little more than an Inn that doubled as the local Pub, a forge, and a general good's trader that was found in town every so often on his way from Lakeshire to Westfall. The roads were always full of passing travelers and adventures that were coming and going. At the time of the small group's appearance several familiar faces greeted them, Jeff was well known in the area as a rather smart figure though nobody really knew what it was he did, he had no skill as a warrior, and as far as anyone knew he knew nothing of magic…the man was an enigma. Oddly enough Randy seemed to be loved by everybody, mainly because of his child like nature, Alex was mainly avoided, due to the extensive fact that things always seemed to go wrong when he was around, and somehow Nick seemed to gather lots of attention because of the fact that something stupid was always happening to him.

Randy at the mean time sat outside on a small tree stump, his body was covered with small animals, when Alex approached him from the village square…

"Hey Randy." He said, "You seen Jeff?"

Randy looked to the sword he'd found at the monastery, "No…but Bob says he's in the pub. Getting plastered." The swordsman replied, "Hey Alex. What's plastered mean?"

Alex sighed, "I'll explain later…and stop talking to that sword. It's really starting to freak me out."

The lone rogue slowly walked toward the inn, he knew Jeff had a thing for strong ale, especially anything dwarven. He really didn't like Jeff when he was drunk, he was a silly drunk, and did some odd things when he was a bit tipsy. Unfortunately, as Alex entered the Inn the pub seemed normal enough, which, in his eyes, meant that Jeff was definitely not there, but, as he walked around there was a commotion from the front door. The night elf looked to see Jeff, his robe and pants completely missing, wearing only an odd looking pair of shorts, covered in small red hearts…

"NOBODY MOVE!!!" He shouted waving around a mug of ale, "I…HAVE MISPLACED MY PANTS!!!" He shouted before seemingly freezing in place with a drunken smile on his face.

Alex made his way to his inebriated leader and snapped his fingers in front of the human's face, "Um…Jeff." He said whistling to get the man's attention, "Hey are you in there?" He asked tapping the man on the forehead with his index finger.

Jeff's body reacted to the poke as if gravity gave way, slowly tilting backward until he fell to the floor still wearing the same stupid smile. Alex sighed deeply as he lifted the human to his feet. Apparently they'd have to wait a bit longer before getting any information…

"I think it's time to admit that you're a bit of an alcoholic." Alex said supporting Jeff on his shoulders.

Jeff smiled stupidly looking to the elf's face, "I know…hic…you are but what am I?" He asked his attention turning to the elf's long ears, "You got…hic…some big $#%'n ears." He paused for a moment, "Where the $#% did that beep come from?"

_**Several hours later……**_

Alex had been left to gather all the information he could about their new mission. Unfortunately, however, his search lead them to nowhere at all, and the team had decided that they would instead travel to Azuremyst Isle from Stormwind City, which only lie a short distance to the north of Goldshire. A good fact, as Jeff was still hardly in any condition to be walking a long distance. It was as they all walked through the bustling city that Randy noticed a poster on the side of a building…

"Oh…look a "Ruler of the Bracelet" movie…" He said, "I love those books."

**(Inside joke if you don't play WoW ignore it…)**

"Meh…" Alex replied, "Those books are overrated…"

Nick looked at the two, "Books…are my mortal enemy."

Alex scoffed, "That's because you're so stupid that your brain tries to read backward…"

The group continued along their path toward Stormwind Harbor, where they would catch a ship to the elven city of Auberdine on the continent Kalimdor to the far west, where they'd have to catch another boat to take them the rest of the way to the small group of islands slightly to the northwest of the massive life tree Teldrasill, where the capitol city of the Night Elves lay. It was a long, tedious trip, but, it was a job after all.

Luckily as they four reached the dock, the ship was getting ready for it's usual trip to the elf's homeland. Randy seemed to be a little excited being he hadn't seen his homeland in some years, Alex on the other hand was not as much happy, he was not exactly well liked among his own people, his clumsiness had cost him more than a few gold pieces. As he sighed a newly recovered Jeff approached him looking over the rail of the ship that was still sitting at the dock…

"You don't look very happy for someone that's going to see home after 10 years." The human said patting him on the back, "Or is this about that time you knocked the torch on the Ancient Protector's foot and he fell on that caravan?"

"No…" Alex sighed.

Jeff thought for a moment, "Hmmm…when you defiled the Moonwell in Darnassus?"

Alex shot about, "I told you a thousand times that was NOT my fault." He shouted, "Besides no."

"The Nightsaber thing then?"

Alex sighed, "Yes…"

"Look you're people seem to heal quick…" Jeff said, "I'm sure the Stable Master has recovered by now. It was only what? 26 broken bones…"

"36…and a ruptured spleen, not to mention now he has a morbid fear of cats."

"Look I'm sure it was just an accident." Jeff said, "You just need to be more careful when you're in stealth. Just because you're invisible doesn't mean you can't still fall down, or hit something, or trip." Jeff paused for a minute, "Oh $#^*, where's Randy and Nick?"

Alex suddenly sprung to attention looking about the deck of the ship, only to find that the two were not there, "Oh no. You take the last two deck, I'll check the first two."

"Agreed." Jeff said rushing off.

_**One long $$ boat ride later……**_

Jeff and Alex met up on the deck of the ship again overlooking the last leg of their trip to Auberdine. They'd managed to find Nick, who'd simply wandered off below deck in a mindless stupor like usual but, their problem was that they couldn't find the manchild anywhere. Until a familiar voice cracked through the air…

"LAND HO!!!" It shouted, "Hee,Hee, I've always wanted to say that."

Jeff and Alex looked about, "Randy? Where the hell is he?"

Jeff sighed and tilted his head toward the crow's nest, "Randy! Get the $#% down from there!"

"Okay." Randy shouted cheerfully leaping off the elevated structure, his impact with the deck causing his legs to vanish below the deck, forming a large hole that buried him up to his thighs.

"That's coming out of your share of the money." Jeff said, "Hope you know that."

Alex shook his head, "You know? Normally people wouldn't jump from the top of a 40 foot mast."

Jeff took the swordsman by the arm helping him to dislodge himself from the deck of the ship, "Yeah, normal people don't name their weaponry after creepy Enzyte spokesmen either."

"Creepy?" Alex asked.

Jeff looked to the rogue, "Yeah. I don't care how well off you are. Nobody smiles that much."

It didn't take much longer for the team to reach Auberdine, the small village as you would expect was surrounded by forestry, it's long wooden dock broke off into four points, the longest of which extended back toward the small village, however, the team was not there to visit. The walked the short distance to the center of the wooden intersection before turning left, where they found they'd have to wait for the ship to Azuremyst. Unfortunately after so many hours they simply sat there…

"IS THAT IT!?!" Nick suddenly yelled gathering everyone's attention.

Everyone looked in the direction that Nick was pointing only to notice he was pointing to the ship that was bound for Darnasuss…

"Dumb $$!" Alex shouted slapping him in the back of the head, "Wrong dock, this one. You know hopefully they'll invent a cure for whatever it is you've got."

"Wait…I'm sick!?!" Nick shouted, "But, I feel fine. Is it serious? I don't wanna die. Alex help me."

"You're only sick in the head, moron."

As Alex tried vainly to explain the point of his joke to the pea-brained paladin, Randy had noticed something. Jeff noticed he was approaching what appeared to be another person waiting for the boat. It was another night elf; she was a bit shorter than Alex or Randy, and much more slim, with long light green hair. She wore light leather gear and carried a long bo staff on her back, which she expertly whipped around striking her stalker in the side of the head, the end of her staff thusly snapped…

"I only know one person with a head that hard." She said whipping around and jumping at the swordsman, "RANDY!!!" She shouted hugging him.

Curious Jeff stood up, "Who's this?" He asked causing Randy to turn around.

"Oh, Jeff. This is Iréa, she's my sister."

"I didn't know you had a sister." The human replied.

"You…never asked."

"Hmm…touché." Jeff said extending a hand, "In that case, I'm Jeff…Jeff Draco."

She happily shook his hand, "Hi, Randy's letters has mentioned a lot about you…" She moved in close, "Is the paladin really that bad off?"

"You kidding me?" Jeff asked, "He makes Randy look like a genius."

It was as they stood there that Iréa's nose twitched a bit, and she sneezed, causing a puff of smoke to cover her body. When it cleared there was only a blue furred, large night saber standing in her place, it had a large white crescent shape on it's front left shoulder over a small oval…

"Damn it…" The cat said, "I did it again."

Randy smiled childishly, "She's a druid."

"Yes Randy. Thank you for pointing out the obvious." Jeff replied.

"Hey, no problem."

Jeff looked the cat over which turned back into the night elf, "Say. Where do your clothes go when you shapeshift like that?"

Iréa looked herself over, "Hmm…Good question." She answered, "I have a little trouble controlling my shapeshifting." She said itching her nose, "And I have allergies."

Jeff chucked for a moment, "Well that sucks…." He said turning to say something to Alex who he found juggling three brightly colored objects, "Hey Alex what is that?"

"It's called juggling."

"NO YOU $#%'n IDIOT!!!" He shouted, "Those in your hands."

Alex stopped catching three fist sized gems of varying colors, "Oh these. I found these about a month ago."

_**Flashback……**_

Alex was wandering about Westfall in search of some Goretusk that Jeff needed for the days supper when a strange sound caught his attention. He quickly looked up only to see a small object hurling toward the ground. Unfortunately as he realized that it's path was on a course with his face. The object collided with the poor night elf's head flattening him to the ground…

"But I don't wanna go to school today…" He stammered on for a moment before shaking his head.

He reached for the small object to find that it was a small blue bag, and inside were five gems of varying colors; a ruby, sapphire, diamond, emerald, and a large garnet. His mouth hung open before he looked to the sky then back to the bag, then to the sky again…

"Thank you god…"

_**End flashback……**_

Jeff sharply smacked the rogue in the back of the head, "You moron, those aren't from god. Those are that Draenei's family jewels."

Iréa's eyes widened, "Come again."

"Forget it…long story." He said turning back to Alex, "You're telling me that you found that guy's jewels over a month ago and you said nothing about it?"

"But they're so pretty." Alex said pulling away in fear of being robbed of the stones.

"You're giving them back Alex."

"NO I'M NOT!!!" Alex shouted, "FINDERS KEEPERS!!!"

_**Many hours later back at Moonbrook……**_

Alex sat in his bed pouting about his lost gems, Jeff was still a bit steamed that he'd bee dragged all the way to Auberdine for absolutely no reason at all. However, on the upside, the team had a new member now in the form of Randy's sister, which in the end made the trip at least a bit worth it. Someone else with a head on their shoulders wasn't a bad idea to have around. However, the downside was obvious…

"Achooooo…." A sneeze rocked the building.

The uncontrollable transformations were getting a bit out of hand…

Jeff pushed a bit of a large dragon tail away from his body, looking around to find that Iréa no longer really fit in the room…

"Wow this is a new one." The dragon chuckled.

Alex at the moment was trapped under her large clawed foot, "For the love of god CHANGE BACK!! CHANGE BACK!!!"

"And whatever you do…" Jeff added, "Don't sneeze again." He said unfortunately the dragon's nose began to twitch, "NO, NO, NO, NO…."

"AAAAAAACHOOOOOOOOOOOO……"

_**Sentinel Hill……**_

"****############%$!!!!!"

A soldier stopped on the road, "Jesus Christ. That was the loudest profanity I've ever heard……"

_**To Be Continued……

* * *

Author Note:** Well hope some of you enjoyed this. Sorry again. Thanks for reading all..._

_The Footsteps in the Darkness - SkullFox  
_


	3. Episode 3: Come Again?

**Author Notes: **_Okay here's chapter three of What the Warcraft? It took some time but, it's an in between thing...not to mention that, and it takes a lot to think up crap this stupid while still trying to maintain a plotline...yes, there will be a point to all of this...it'll be stupid but, it'll be a point. Thanks for viewing anyhow. R&R, whether it's to tell me to #%$ off or for anyother reason. I just like getting a response from my work. Thanks again all..._

_The Footsteps in the Darkness ~ SkullFox_

**

* * *

**

_**Episode #3: **_**Come again?**

Randy and Iréa went about repairing a massive hole in the side of the team's home. The poor druid felt horrible, as the dragon she'd turned into had blown away a good portion of the wall when she sneezed. Randy wandered off for a moment and suddenly returned with what appeared to be more lumber from Sentinel Hill than seemed possible to carry. It was as Jeff walked outside to inspect their work that he looked Randy over…

"Why aren't the others helping?" The warrior wined.

Jeff sighed, "Because they're not here." He replied, "They're out looking for that wack job that wants that book. For some reason he'd just not around." As he made his way around the building Jeff looked to Iréa who was hammering a large panel of wood into place, "Hey Iréa. Sure you can't turn into something helpful…you know like an Ogre?"

"Ewww. Don't even joke like that. Ogres are gross. I'd rather die."

Jeff laughed, "Could be worse…next time you sneeze you just might turn into a greenskin."

Jeff swiftly dodged a flying hammer, "Shut up! You're making me afraid of my own transformations." Iréa shouted, "Orcs are ugly as hell. And Trolls look like the illegitimate offspring on a drunken Orc and a walrus." She suddenly shivered, "At least I hope it was illegitimate."

Jeff laughed out loud, "Yeah…trolls are pretty #%$*'n ugly."

Iréa looked at the sky, "What the hell was that beep for?"

Jeff thought for a second, "Oh right. That's this stupid #$$ author won't let us curse. See go ahead, give it a try."

Iréa took a deep breath, "#%$*!!!!!!!!!!"

"Holy $#*%…" Jeff said pulling his hands away from his ears, "I think they heard that in Stormwind." He said, "Anyhow, you two have been working for a few hours why not come inside and have some lunch. Just if you feel like sneezing…please, go outside…"

_**A swamp somewhere……**_

Alex looked about while Nick mindlessly inspected a small pond of water where some frogs were lazing about. As he stood there Alex turned about; they were completely surrounded by marshland areas. As he studied the area he remembered what that informant had told him…

"Hmmmm…this doesn't look like Dalaran at all." He said to himself. Alex sharply turned to Nick, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!"

Startled, Nick fell back into the water, "I didn't do it…" He yelled covering his face with his arms.

Alex sighed, "No point blaming you. You're too stupid to even understand your own mistakes." He said, "Oh well. Let's try to find our way back to that town."

"I think it was back this way…"Nick said pointing to the east.

"Oh, no. I'm not following your instructions, you go that way if you want, I'm going this way." Alex said walking to the west.

Nick shrugged his shoulders and turned toward the open swamp; the eyes of a thousand deadly predators weighed down on him, even if only in his mind, the darkness that blanketed the area could have hidden anything from sight. A small shiver trailed down the Paladin's spine and he slowly turned his head to one side…the face that met his was something he'd only seen in his own nightmares, it had blood dripping from it's fangs and a wide, white toothed grin, with pale white skin, it almost looked human if it weren't for it's blood red eyes…

"Boo…" It lightly whispered raising it's eyebrows, while releasing a purely murderous laugh.

"ALLLLLEEEEXXXXXXXX!!!!" Nick screamed in horror rushing off toward the Rouge.

A young human soldier set to patrol the area stood there, he'd attempted to get the Paladin's attention but, something caused the Knight to freeze up and rush off screaming…

"Wonder what got into him…" The man wondered not knowing what product of madness the Paladin's mind had warped his image into out of fear of being left in the dark, "Well…hope those two can handle themselves okay." He said to himself raising his torch against the darkness, "Some nasty beasts lurking in this swamp."

_**A few hours later…**_

Jeff sat in the large main room of the groups headquarters, his only company the young Druid who clearly had no real grasp on her own powers just yet. He found the Night Elf to be an interesting conundrum; she was nothing like her brother, who he'd once associated with having the mindset of an adolescent child, she was on the other hand rather intelligent spare for the fact that at time to time she showed signs of the same scatterbrained antics that Randy showed in his day to day routine, though on a very diminished scale. As he sat down passing the lady a cup of tea he looked to the wall that her previous transformation had destroyed; Randy was still working hard to fix it…

"Well that's one thing I can always say about your brother…" The human started, "He always gets things done…"

Iréa nodded, "Umm-hmm…he's always been a good worker. He's just……well you know…stupid."

"HEY!!" Randy shouted stopping his hammering, "SHUT UP!!" He said before going back to work.

Jeff thought for a moment, "So what's the deal with you two anyway? I've known Randy for years but, to be honest I don't really know that much about him."

"Well…" Iréa started, "Randy came to the Eastern Kingdom to learn to fight; he tried archery like normal elves but, lets just say he didn't really pick it up…he sort of shot his teacher…" She said patting her backside.

Jeff chuckled while looking back to Randy, "You shot your teacher in the $$?"

Randy peeked through a still missing plank of wood, "It was only once…" He caught Iréa giving him an accusing look, "Okay six times, but the Nightsaber was the last one…"

"The teacher, our father, the nightsaber, a bear, a poor little squirrel, and you almost killed Alex." Iréa said, "Not to mention that one arrow that you sent off of Teldrasill…we still don't know where it landed. What are you supposed to be anyhow?" She changed the subject, "A mage or something? I always see you wearing robes and such."

Jeff looked to the blood red robes that he wore, "Nope not a mage, just like the robes."

"Priest?" She asked.

"Nope…"

"Warlock?"

"No…"

"Some kind of Monk?"

"Sorry…I'm just me." Jeff replied, "If you gotta classify it just call me…an…Epic Peasant."

Iréa lifted an eyebrow, "Epic? Peasant?"

"Yeah…I don't have abilities but, I'm still better than everyone else."

Randy looked outside, noticing that it was night time, "Hey…Jeff…" He asked, "Where are Alex and Nick?"

"Good question…" Jeff replied, "Those morons should have been back by now. Well I guess we'd better go looking for them."

**Dustwollow Marsh……**

**Several Hours later……**

Jeff's small group followed a lead that led them to the swamps of Kalimdor, however their searches of the area proved less than profitable. The locals of the area pointed the human, and two night elves out to the east; where Jeff was given the assumption that Alex and Nick had lost their ways and possibly wondered into the Barrens where they were probably caught by the Horde. However, they were lucky enough to come across a young human soldier that had recently met a strange paladin…

"Yes…I saw someone like that…" He said, "Strange fellow thought. I tried to warn him and his elf friend that this place was dangerous but, he screamed in my face and ran off yelling for Alex…whoever that is…"

Jeff slapped his hand against his forehead, "Nick…Could you tell us where they went?"

"Actually they headed out that way…" The soldier replied pointing toward the hills, "I just hope they're okay, there's been a lot of dragonkin activity around that area."

Jeff headed off with Randy and Iréa following behind him, "Thank you."

"Are you certain you want to go out there?" The soldier called.

"No I don't…" Jeff shouted back, "…but I can't let dragons eat a retard like Nick…It might spread. The last thing we want are a bunch of dragons acting like Nick."

**Somewhere Dark and Hot…**

Alex wiped a bit of sweat from his forehead as he and Nick made their way around the large cave they'd ducked into to avoid the Dragonkin that had chased them. He had no idea where they were, he'd never been to this part of Kalimdor before (AN: Hah. That totally rhymed), but, was certain that he and Nick were somewhere they didn't want to be…

"Okay Nick they're gone we can…" Alex cut himself off as he realized the paladin was nowhere near him, "Nick? Niiiiick?" He sighed as he realized the paladin had wandered further into the cavern, "Oh you stupid #%$^."

Alex began to wander into the cave, Nick was an idiot but, he couldn't just let the moron die. The slightly frightened rogue snuck through the caverns afraid that he may be spotted by something or someone, it was an odd place he found himself in, the cave seemed to be dark and light at the same time, while it remained hot and sweltering. His footsteps, being a rogue, were almost non-existent as he found that he could easily move through the shadows as long as he wasn't under any kind of pressure…

"You know…this place reminds me of something I read in a book once." He said to himself, "Now if only I could remember what book."

"Ooooo Pretty." A voice echoed through the tunnel.

"Well…least I found Nick."

Alex followed the echoing voice to a large room, it was very open with dozens of large stones around it's perimeter, and a mass of scorched blackened stones at it's center. Near the stones, the absent minded Paladin was digging through what came instantly to the thief's mind…

"Gold…." He whispered to himself, "It shall all be mine."

**Dustwollow Marsh......**

Jeff, Randy, and Iréa walked through a large open area covered in trees and tall hillsides, where large pools of stagnant swamp water gave off a foul smell. It was as they walked however that Jeff suddenly knelt down picking something up out of the muck……

"Hmm…Snickers." He said handing Randy a small wrapper.

Randy gasped as he looked at the candy bar wrapper, "My stash." He said holding it toward Jeff, "See I told you Bob said someone was in my room."

"Randy calm down." Jeff replied, "And stop talking to that #%$'n sword." He suddenly turned looking at the sky, "You ass, can't you just let me say it one #%$'n time?!" He huffed turning and continuing down their path, "Geez……Authors." As he walked the robe wearing human slipped on something and rolled down a small hill stopping a fraction of an inch from being impaled through the face by a broken branch, he simply sat there frozen…

Randy chuckled as he walked by patting his friend on the shoulder, "That's what you get for bad mouthing the Author Jeff. Even I'm smarter than that."

As Randy and Iréa walked by Jeff pointed to the sky, "You're gonna pay for that." A sudden flash of lighting caused him to jump a bit, "Alright, alright! Calm the #%$ down already!"

Jeff met up with the two sibling Night Elves, and eventually the three of them made their way further and further into the swamp. It seemed like forever they traveled through that place before they found themselves standing before a hung gate that looked remarkably dangerous, and a lot like a large set of teeth…

Jeff sighed, "Twenty to one says they're inside."

They stepped inside and Randy shook his hair dry, "Wow, it's warm in here."

"For once I agree with you." Iréa replied, "What kind of cavern is this?"

Suddenly a screaming voice echoed through the cave, a familiar voice, "I REMEMBER THE BOOK!!! I REMEMBER THE BOOK!!!" Alex's voice shouted as something unseen slammed into Randy's heavily armored chest falling to the ground, where the rogue suddenly came into view.

"ALEX!!!" Randy shouted helping him up, "Hi." He added hugging the elf happily.

"Get off me." Alex shouted pushing the warrior away, "Big, huge, black, wings, tail, claws, fire…eyes BIG!" He shouted in a panicking voice, "Book said it, never mess with a dragon…never ever mess with a dragon."

*******

Nick picked up a large golden goblet and stared into it's highly reflective surface. He was a bit curious about why it was Alex would run off the way he did muttering something about, Huge or large, something like that, then again the Paladin was a bit mesmerized by the pretty shiny things at the time. A hot wind however blew through his armor suddenly bringing him to an instant sweat. He turned after noticing something moving in the reflection off the goblet only to turn into the face of a massive black dragon; it's head roughly triangular shaped, with large fangs that protruded slightly over it's lower lip, it's head was decorated by a mess of horns that gave the appearance of a sort of hair, while it's length was sever yards long, it's eyes were blood red…

"Hello little one." It welcomed him in a rather feminine voice.

"Oh, big." Nick said, "What's your name?"

The dragon chuckled, "Onyxia, most humans have heard of me." She replied, "Aren't you going to run?"

Nick looked around, "I don't like running…it makes my feet hurt."

Onyxia laughed, "You are an odd little fellow for your kind. You realize that you are thrashing about in a dragon's horde do you not?" She asked gaping her large mouth open allowing a hot breath to dry the human's eyes.

Nick looked to the goblet for a moment then to the dragon, before looking to the pile of gold and back to her again, "Oh this is yours."

The dragon's laughter erupted from the area, "You are an entertaining human…" She bellowed, "I think having a slave as entertaining as you may prove a bit…relaxing."

As she turned to walk a bit away, her long neck seemed to stiffen up, "I smell……magic." She said inhaling deeply, "Strong magic, dark magic."

The massive black dragon whipped her head about, sniffing the air, suddenly however she whipped her head around at the feel of something lightly brushing against the scales of her foreleg, only to find a heavily armored night elf admiring their polished surface…

"Hi…" Randy said waving to her before looking back to her scales, "You have really pretty scales."

The massive reptile chuckled, she was vain, as any dragon was, and prided herself on hearing others speak of her beauty and marvel…

"Flattery will get you everywhere." She said sniffing the air, "However, there is still the matter of this smell that lingers about my lair. It reeks of witchcraft." This time Onyxia swung her head toward a small group of people next to Nick, eyeing Jeff intently, "You."

The human froze, "Hello mother."

The dragon sighed, "I can see, my son that your taste in friends has not changed for the better."

"You said it yourself mother…you'd rather I ran about with humans my whole life than to follow Deathwing's whims."

The dragon slowly lay down, "Yes, I tired of his ways may decades ago. My taste for all of this horrid fighting with the mortals is wearing my need to fight thin." She sighed, "I suppose I should simply let the next batch of those hunters take my head and be done with it all."

"Mother I told you that humans are not as bad as grandfather wants you to think…" He said looking off to Nick and Randy, "Some are a bit more than entertaining, and the Night Elves are not typically one's to hold a grudge."

"I don't like Grudges…" Randy suddenly said, "Those movies scare me."

Alex still stood there in shock, "Mo-mo-mother?" He asked looking to Jeff, "What the $#%!?!"

Onyxia laughed, "Surely you did notice something different about him."

Alex thought for a moment, "No he usually just sits back and tell everyone else what to….oh my god he is a dragon."

"Tell me little one." She said turning her head toward Jeff, "Do you still use that ridiculous Surname?" She asked, "Draco…calling yourself dragon right in front of their faces was a bold statement my son."

"Some are smarter than others…" He replied turning his head to see Randy playing with the blue furred feline that was clearly his sister, "And some are pleasantly simpleminded. The mortals' eccentricities far outweigh their narrow scope of things." He smiled at Alex, "You could look nothing like them and convince them that you are their ilk…and yet it can take decades to earn their trust. As for this lot……" He said looking around, "They are family."

Onyxia smiled, "I will think about your words…" She said, "However, humans may be hesitant to accept us."

"Mother…" Jeff replied, "The ancient dragons were incredibly wise, and they chose to protect the mortals from Grandfather at the price of their own lives. I refuse to believe that this was all in vein, they must have saw something in the humans that they deemed worthy of life."

The large reptile sighed, "You speak with great wisdom." She said, "I can see that you are still cursed as well. It seems to have little hold on you here."

"The curse is not all bad mother…" Jeff said, "It may rob me of my true form, and make me speak like an average human. Inside this lair it seems to have a lighter hold on me. Your presence may be enough alone to hold it at bay." He said reaching beneath his robes, "Also I have something I would like you to look at." He said pulling a familiar book from beneath his robes, "This book troubles me…I cannot seem to leave it anywhere, it finds it's way back to me."

The large dragon took a deep breath of the air about the book, "Hmmm…Demonic magic. This was the source of the dark magic I sensed." She said, "Where did you find this?"

"The Scarlet Monastery…we were hired to recover it." He said, "The man gave us no name."

"The book has bound itself to you." Onyxia said, "You may want to find this character that sent you to find the book…he or she, may have hidden motives."

At the sound of a loud sneeze everyone looked to the small group where Randy, Nick, and a large spider that was clearly once Iréa all stood. The elven warrior's eyes tripled in size at the sight of the huge arachnid…

"Oh no." Jeff said, "It had to be a #%$ing spider."

The black dragon looked about, "What was that noise?"

"Stupid author…teen rating you'll catch on eventually." Jeff replied.

The team all turned to Randy as the elf quickly hefted something over his head swinging it down into the stone floor, just in time for Iréa to jump out of the way….

"OW!!" Nick yelled.

The absent minded paladin hadn't even realized that he'd been in the air until he'd been brought down on his back, with a painful thud. His ankles in Randy's vice like grip; the paladin found himself hefted quickly into the air again before being brought back down on his back again. Randy rapidly lifted his armor plated flyswatter slamming the helpless human repeatedly into the ground missing the spider by mere inches at a time……

"OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW!!!" Nick yelled repeatedly as his body impacted the floor.

"The elf is rather amusing." Onyxia chuckled, "You have interesting friends my son."

"He is." Jeff replied, "His absentmindedness misleads his true intellect. He is skilled for one with his particular mindset."

"Don't you suppose you should stop him from murdering his sibling?" Onyxia asked.

Jeff sighed, "Very well…" He said stepping to one side before stretching his leg out into the warrior's path.

Randy, predictably ran into the human's large leg falling on his face. Nick, his trusty weapon, was torn from the elf's grip sending him flying through the air where he vanished into the piles of gold and jewels that made of Onyxia's hoard. Suddenly the spider burst into blue smoke again reverting back into her normal form..

"Thank you Jeff." She said rubbing her nose.

"My pleasure." Jeff replied, "You may want to learn a bit more control of that in the near future. I won't always be around to keep Randy from killing you."

Alex thought for a moment, "Do you even have a normal name?" He asked Jeff.

"My name is my name. I suppose you expected something a bit more complicated didn't you?" He replied, "I am simply Jeff…or Jeffery…though I do not like the sound of Jeffery much."

"Either way I think we should go." Alex said, "We need to find the guy that sent us to find that book."

"You're right." Jeff replied, "We should go. It was good seeing you again mother. I'm afraid that when I am not around places like this I cannot really think clearly enough to come visit on a regular basis."

"Well my son…I understand." She replied, "At the moment however, I think you should head back to your home. Stormwind is an epicenter of information, perhaps you can find this odd peddler there when the caravans come through the market."

As Jeff walked away Iréa stayed behind for a moment, "I was told stories as a child about a female black dragon that wanted to kill everyone."

"Yes." Onyxia replied lowering her head to the floor to look the elf in the eyes, "I was enticed by my father's way of thinking little one. I'm afraid it is easy to accept an easy solution, even when you are a dragon."

"Mother always said that you were pure evil…" Iréa said rubbing the dragon's snout, "After meeting you…I don't believe that she is correct; misguided, misunderstood, but…not evil."

"You are incredibly understanding…" Onyxia chuckled nudging Iréa with her nose, "Like any great Druid should be."

Iréa sighed, "I am not a great anything…perhaps a great failure." She smiled.

"I have seen Druids in the past do much worse." Onyxia replied, "You are still incredibly young for your kind…your people may no longer be immortal but, you are incredibly long lived. You are attempting to master an art as old as your people…it will take time."

Iréa smiled, "I understand…I will…try harder."

The small group was joined by the female elf, and headed on their trip. From where she lay Onyxia could hear their friendly chatter amongst themselves as they exited the cavern, where she was certain Jeff's mind would revert back to his human stupor. There was a sudden sneeze that carried through her cavern, followed by a joyful yell…

"Woo Hoo!" Randy's voice yelled, "A horse! No more walking!"

"OW get off me!!" Iréa yelled out.

"Randy stop riding your sister." Alex's voice added.

"%#$'n Giggidy!" Jeff shouted.

"There's that %#$'n beep again!" Nick shouted.

The dragon could only sighed with a slight chuckle to herself as she lay down, while Jeff and his group made their way to the port to catch the ferry back to the Eastern Kingdom, where they could all head home…

_**To Be Continued……**_

_Stay tuned for Episode 4...Horde? What Horde?_


End file.
